One of the most interesting parts of analyzing social media is typecasting the users of each network. While many of them have similar functions, like Facebook and Google+, their users’ personalities are often incredibly different and distinct from one another. So what would social networks look and act like if they were people like their users? We built profiles for the websites where you likely have a profile of your own to see.
Facebook: While not necessarily trendy or fresh, Facebook is certainly popular. Upbeat and positive, he doesn’t dislike anything. He knows everyone and everyone wants to know him. He’s very vocal about his interests, whether they are music, places, or charitable causes. He seems to be everywhere all the time and is great at organizing parties and events. He’s very into sharing, but can sometimes be kind of pushy when it comes to doing so. While Facebook is a nice friend to have, be careful how much you share with him – he’ll likely share it with the world.
Twitter: Hyperactive and chatty, Twitter is your classic scatterbrain. She loves to talk about herself and is usually doing so, broadcasting the most insignificant details of her life to the world as thought they were breaking news. She’s not very good at telling stories – a loud, fast talker, you’ve got to really pay attention to Twitter to understand what she’s trying to tell you. While she enjoys talking about herself, at heart, Twitter loves to talk about other peoples’ drama. She’s a real world Gossip Girl, always keeping an eye out drama in the lives of her friends, family, and celebrities. Despite being a little air-headed at times, when she’s funny, she’s funny. She’s also great at quoting things verbatim.
Instagram: Instagram describes herself as “artsy” in the hopes that other people will believe that she is. After buying a camera online and reading the first page of the Introduction Manual, she’s a self-proclaimed photographer who loves stopping in the street to take a picture of a squirrel and asking people to pose for a few pictures. She shares her photos constantly, always seeking approval and validation from her peers. She’s very into food trucks and alternative music, and considers herself a serious person. Her head is always up in the clouds thinking about the next photograph she’ll be able to take. Because of this, she often unintentionally misses out on important events – when her boyfriend proposed, she grabbed her camera and started shooting rather than say yes.
Reddit: A cool guy who’s a geek at heart, Reddit is a snarky, sarcastic know-it-all. He’s interested in learning, but not about typical, nerd stuff – this guy is an expert in his favorite TV show, video game hacks, and the funniest new Internet memes. Reddit can usually be found wearing a zip-up hoodie sitting at his laptop at home. Although he’s overtly passionate about his interests, Reddit doesn’t let his emotions show – unless, of course, you’re showing him pictures of your new puppy or kitten.
YouTube: YouTube is a hyperactive consumer, quickly moving from one thing to the next. Whether he’s eating candy, binge-watching TV shows, or listening to music, YouTube loves passionately, leaves quickly, and is onto something new in the blink of an eye. He’s not cruel though – he’s just got a lot of enthusiasm and energy. With a slightly weird sense of humor and a flair for drama, you can bet that this class clown was a thesbian in high school and will never grow up.
Google+: Google+ is the trendy tech-hipster who works as a digital marketing manager but always wanted a cool, high-profile career, like being a DJ or starting his own magazine. He’s quick to invest in up-and-coming trends and slow to drop them when it becomes clear that they’re not going to make it. He’s cliquey, and only allows people he deems cool enough into his inner circle. While he maintains that he doesn’t care about being cool, the truth is that that’s all he really wants. He’s jealous of Facebook’s popularity, although he would never admit it.
Pinterest: She’s crafty, she’s sooooo excited, she loves her sorority sisters; she’s Pinterest. This girl has been planning her wedding, dream house, first child’s nursery, second child’s nursery, and retirement vacation travels for 2 years now, despite being single and 19. She loves fall, boots, and pumpkin spice lattes almost as much as she loves motivational quotes. She DIYed the flower pin that is attached to her homemade circle scarf (made by her best friend, Etsy). If you compliment her hair, she’ll likely spend the next 20 minutes showing you how the internet taught her to style it that way. She can’t cook, but has more recipes on file than Martha Stewart herself. She’s the ultimate impulse shopper, buying anything and everything that interests her, regardless of whether or not she actually needs it.
Tumblr: Tumblr is quiet, keeps to herself, and seems like a typical bookworm until she shows you her wild side. This glasses-wearing, long-haired girl exemplifies indie. She loves cats, listened to Lorde before you did, and is really into cult TV shows. She’s mocking and ironic, but has a soft spot for literary quotes and grandma-esque floral prints. She seems unintimidating, but cross her, and you’ll see her claws come out.
LinkedIn: LinkedIn is incredibly mature and professional. He lives to work as opposed to working to live, and spends many nights working late (though, when you really enjoy it, do you still call it work?). LinkedIn has been career-oriented from a young age – he singlehandedly founded the Young Business Professionals Association when he was in school… elementary school, that is. He reads Forbes and Inc. Magazine almost as regularly as he balances his checkbook. His circle of friends is small, and he doesn’t share personal information with anyone outside of it. Most of his conversations revolve around past jobs and he namedrops quite frequently. While he’s uptight, he’s a kind person who is willing to help out a colleague if they ask.
Vine: Quick-witted and fast, Vine is a high-level performer who is always on the move. He’s very funny and expressive. He loves change, so can’t usually be found lounging around or hanging out in the same place twice. Tall and skinny, you won’t miss Vine walking down the street in bright colors and patterns. His friends, like him, are full of energy and up for anything. If you’re looking to befriend this fellow, be prepared for endless activities and laughs.
Snapchat: Snapchat is Twitter’s middle school-aged sister. She is every bit as scatterbrained and inward thinking as Twitter, but worse. While Twitter is telling her friends about how much she loves One Direction, Snapchat is proving how much she loves them by singing their music as loud as she can in the lunch line. She probably spends too much time posing in front of the mirror and likely has no idea what’s going on outside of her own head. Oblivious to the world around her, expect to see Snapchat taking selfies in inappropriate places, like at the DMV or a funeral home
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